Perfectionism

Overview

Hi, I'm Mindy. Do you ever feel constantly chased by thoughts like 'This isn't good enough' or 'I can't afford to make a mistake'? Perfectionism is the tendency to set unrealistically high standards for yourself or your surroundings, and to feel intense dissatisfaction and self-blame when those standards aren't met. Having high goals in itself isn't a bad thing — but when those goals start to suffocate your life, that's when it becomes a problem. It's important to understand the line between healthy striving and harmful perfectionism.

Key Concepts

Does This Sound Like You?

You've already written a perfectly good report, but you keep revising it endlessly thinking 'it's still not enough,' and end up missing the deadline. Getting a 99 on a test but fixating on the one question you got wrong, asking yourself 'why did I get that wrong?' — that's perfectionism too. Wanting to start something new but putting it off until you're 'perfectly prepared,' only to never start at all — that's the same pattern.

How Can You Cope?

Practice replacing 'perfect' with 'good enough.' There are many situations where 80% completion is more than sufficient. Try 'imperfection exercises' — intentionally making small, minor mistakes. It's important to experience firsthand that nothing catastrophic happens when you slip up. Focus on the process. Practicing placing value on effort and growth rather than outcomes can be very helpful. Tell your inner critic: 'I'm actually doing really well right now.'

A Word from Mindy

You are a person of great worth, even without being perfect. Imperfection isn't a flaw — it's what makes you human. Give yourself permission sometimes to say, 'This is enough.' Mindy loves you just as you are, imperfections and all.